Recently I had lunch with the VP of Human Resources of a technology company in Silicon Valley. I was surprised to learn that we had more in common than I thought: we’re both of Hispanic descent, and we both came to this country looking for a better life than we knew at home. When he first made the journey, the only possessions he had to his name were the clothes on his back, a few dollars, and a couple of family mementos. I came with a bit more than that, but needless to say, we both came here with little more than hope and the will to make our lives better.

One of the things that have been integral to my success in that department is the advice of others. I’ve had many mentors—both personal and professional—whose advice has helped me get to where I am today. During my conversation with the VP, he told me a story about when he gave advice to his young 4-year-old son that reinforced my belief in the importance of good advice. The boy was acting up and behaving in a way that could potentially become dangerous. His father took action to prevent his son from continuing this behavior. Naturally, his son wasn’t very happy about it.  But once he’d calmed down, his father was able to explain to him that he hadn’t corrected him because he was doing something wrong.  His child was doing what children do,  learn and explore and  his job as a father, was is to teach and protect .

The little boy is a man now, and he still remembers that conversation. I was moved and inspired by the power of this simple, yet very important, piece of advice given from father to son, and it made me think about how we as adults take advice.

We often take the feedback we’re given far too seriously or too personally, especially when it comes from someone of authority. The affect can be so strong that, many times, we’re too hurt or offended to see the value in the advice. Unlike children, who don’t yet have egos to worry about, adults let their egos get in the way. Sometimes we’re given instruction at work, and how we take that instruction is dependent upon the size of our ego. The bigger the ego, the more resistance we create.

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  1. a) We never really grow up, and we should forever be doing what that 4-year-old’s father told him to do: to learn and explore.
  1. b) It’s always importance to have someone to teach you and protect you from causing harm to yourself.

As an adult, that means finding people equipped with the knowledge and resources to give you good advice; in other words, mentors. Mentors are people who have already solved the problems you face. A friend of mine, Ravi, has made it his mission in life to help people find the mentors they need to succeed. His company, MentorCloud, helps people and organizations collaborate and support one another to achieve their personal, academic, and professional aspirations. If you’re looking for support and valuable advice, find a mentor. You will grow tremendously.

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